Many of you will have participated on training courses at work, where you're taught that communication is more than just the words. In fact, when talking to someone, the actual words used convey the least meaning. When you verbally deliver a message, you have the option of varying the sense of the words by the tone you use, and your body language and behaviour as you speak says more to the receiver than both of these. If this is something you learnt before, then just take a few minutes to ponder on it; and if this is something new to you, then perhaps take a few more minutes to consider.
When we communicate with our animals it works very similarly. We get to know each other very well, so we learn what some of the words sound like. Our cats and dogs will know the word for food (or whatever word we use), and other things that are important to them, and repeated often. We get to know some of their words too. Perhaps not so consciously, but when you stop to think about it you'll realise that's true.
Then there's how the words are delivered....... For example, if Bella wants to eat she'll come and tell me, and I know what this word sounds like. But if I'm distracted or doing something, and she's not getting through, she'll shout. If I look at her while she's doing this her face and body posture changes; she's putting all her energy into trying to get me to listen/understand. So she's using her body language too.
From this I can appreciate how important it is. Then if I get up to follow her into the kitchen, I get confirmation as to what she wants by where she goes. If she were desperate to relieve herself she'd be standing by the back door, still shouting up at me (even though she has a litter tray, she always prefers to go outside). When it's food she'll lead me round to the left hand side of the kitchen - that's the direction of the cupboard where her food is stored.
So from this I've understood in 3 ways what she wants and how urgent it is. If I continue to be distracted, eventually she'll stop, have a grumble, and walk away grumbling more. Sometimes she might have a bit of a tantrum, running all over the place, trying to lose some of the energy she's built up. (It's very funny, I try not to laugh!!).
If I want her to do something, I'll talk to her too, and will employ all three methods too so that she understands what's needed.
But there's more to it than that. All animals communicate through the medium of feelings, so there's a further dimension of meaning in communication. We have that ability too, but largely we've forgotten how to do it. It's been many, many thousands of years since human beings learnt to speak, and in that time we've buried the other ways that we know to communicate. Speaking is easy, it's immediate and leaves little room for misunderstanding (or does it?), so as we've evolved, we've come to depend on verbal (and its younger brother, written) communication to convey ideas and thoughts more and more and more.
Trouble is, it's moved us further away from our animal companions. They do what they can to communicate verbally with us, but they do get very frustrated that we're not listening with all our senses. We miss so much.
But it is very easy to learn how to do that, much easier than most people think. In fact we do it all the time without being being very aware that that's what we're doing.
To do this we just have to get back in touch with our feelings and emotions, and spend less time in our minds, thinking and talking. Meditation is great for this. It's just a process whereby we sit quietly and still the mind. One of the simplest ways is just to follow the breath - and by that I mean to be conscious of breathing, how the breath is moving into, around, and out of the body. Don't be impatient with this, it does take time and practice. Just enjoy it for what it is and what it brings you (which will amaze you). If you make meditation a regular practice you'll soon notice a difference in yourself.
And one of the other great things you can do is to try to live in the moment at all times. This is what our animals do, and this will bring you into their world. And as with meditation, you'll discover all sorts of wonderful unexpected benefits. We only ever live in the moment of now. It moves along with us, but that's the only place we exist. What's happened has gone, so absolutely no point in languishing in guilt, regret or any of those other destructive emotions. And the future hasn't happened, and never will, it's unreal - it's just a now moment that continues to move along with us.
These two practices will become habits that you'll enjoy, and will bring you closer to your animals, as well as bringing you so much more. I'll write again in a couple of weeks, saying more about what you can do to communicate intuitively with your animals - through emotions and feelings - once you've become used to stilling the mind and living in the present.
When we communicate with our animals it works very similarly. We get to know each other very well, so we learn what some of the words sound like. Our cats and dogs will know the word for food (or whatever word we use), and other things that are important to them, and repeated often. We get to know some of their words too. Perhaps not so consciously, but when you stop to think about it you'll realise that's true.
Then there's how the words are delivered....... For example, if Bella wants to eat she'll come and tell me, and I know what this word sounds like. But if I'm distracted or doing something, and she's not getting through, she'll shout. If I look at her while she's doing this her face and body posture changes; she's putting all her energy into trying to get me to listen/understand. So she's using her body language too.
From this I can appreciate how important it is. Then if I get up to follow her into the kitchen, I get confirmation as to what she wants by where she goes. If she were desperate to relieve herself she'd be standing by the back door, still shouting up at me (even though she has a litter tray, she always prefers to go outside). When it's food she'll lead me round to the left hand side of the kitchen - that's the direction of the cupboard where her food is stored.
So from this I've understood in 3 ways what she wants and how urgent it is. If I continue to be distracted, eventually she'll stop, have a grumble, and walk away grumbling more. Sometimes she might have a bit of a tantrum, running all over the place, trying to lose some of the energy she's built up. (It's very funny, I try not to laugh!!).
If I want her to do something, I'll talk to her too, and will employ all three methods too so that she understands what's needed.
But there's more to it than that. All animals communicate through the medium of feelings, so there's a further dimension of meaning in communication. We have that ability too, but largely we've forgotten how to do it. It's been many, many thousands of years since human beings learnt to speak, and in that time we've buried the other ways that we know to communicate. Speaking is easy, it's immediate and leaves little room for misunderstanding (or does it?), so as we've evolved, we've come to depend on verbal (and its younger brother, written) communication to convey ideas and thoughts more and more and more.
Trouble is, it's moved us further away from our animal companions. They do what they can to communicate verbally with us, but they do get very frustrated that we're not listening with all our senses. We miss so much.
But it is very easy to learn how to do that, much easier than most people think. In fact we do it all the time without being being very aware that that's what we're doing.
To do this we just have to get back in touch with our feelings and emotions, and spend less time in our minds, thinking and talking. Meditation is great for this. It's just a process whereby we sit quietly and still the mind. One of the simplest ways is just to follow the breath - and by that I mean to be conscious of breathing, how the breath is moving into, around, and out of the body. Don't be impatient with this, it does take time and practice. Just enjoy it for what it is and what it brings you (which will amaze you). If you make meditation a regular practice you'll soon notice a difference in yourself.
And one of the other great things you can do is to try to live in the moment at all times. This is what our animals do, and this will bring you into their world. And as with meditation, you'll discover all sorts of wonderful unexpected benefits. We only ever live in the moment of now. It moves along with us, but that's the only place we exist. What's happened has gone, so absolutely no point in languishing in guilt, regret or any of those other destructive emotions. And the future hasn't happened, and never will, it's unreal - it's just a now moment that continues to move along with us.
These two practices will become habits that you'll enjoy, and will bring you closer to your animals, as well as bringing you so much more. I'll write again in a couple of weeks, saying more about what you can do to communicate intuitively with your animals - through emotions and feelings - once you've become used to stilling the mind and living in the present.
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